Keeping the best interests of the children top of mind is even more important with a special needs child.
In any divorce involving children, the courts approach the divorce agreements related to the care and support of the children with an eye to promoting the children’s best interests, which may or may not be in line with the parents’ desires. This approach is even more important in divorces involving special needs children. Here are some of the main points to bear in mind when planning out how best to care for your special needs child after your divorce.
Effective Communication is Essential
In general, children tend to fare better when their divorced parents are able to communicate in a civil manner and present a united front in terms of rules, discipline, and routines. This ensures the children know what to expect no matter which home they happen to be in at any given time. This is especially important for special needs children who may have limited communication skills of their own or difficulties adapting to changes in their routine. Good communication between parents is also important for children who may have complicated medical care requirements. Both parents must be committed to keeping up with all the necessary appointments, medications, or therapies in order for the child to progress.
Custody and Visitation May Be Limited
Sometimes, developmental issues in special needs children leave them with difficulty understanding the concept of shared custody. They may fear that being dropped off at one parent’s house means they will never see the other parent again, and if they lack an understanding of time they may feel they’ve been abandoned forever by the time they are due to return to the other parent’s home. While in most cases the court regards equal time with both parents to be in the best interests of the child, this would not hold true in this example. Instead, it would be wise for parents to recognize their child’s need for stability and consistency and agree to more in-home visitation rather than shared custody. This is a perfect example of parents needing to set aside their own very natural desire for time with their child in favor of doing what is best for the child.
Child Support May Be Increased or Extended
When children have lots of medical needs, naturally the parent with primary custody would be entitled to more child support. For example, if a child requires a night nurse this could be a large expense indeed that should be shared by the parents as they are able. Another possibility is that a special needs child may never be able to become financially independent, in which case the parents would need to agree to modify child support to extend beyond the normal expiration point (which would be when the child turned 18). Parents may need to work together to set up a trust for the child’s care after they pass away as well.
